Focus on: ‘Real’ Networking

How do you really network? Of late, I have been observing many people monopolizing, not conversing. Then I have to listen to both parties of that conversation complain that they ‘hate’ networking. Well, no wonder!

When I meet up with a certain acquaintance of mine, she will go through the motions of asking me how I am.

When I share what’s going on, it goes right past her and she goes off on something else. It feels as if she’s going down a checklist she got from some prehistoric relationship or networking seminar.

Sometimes I don’t even get to finish my answer and she’s off with another question or what she’s doing. It feels like a fake or one-sided conversation.

So, don’t ask someone how they are doing and then when they respond with what’s going on, you neglect to engage or ask another question. Don’t continue to dominate the conversation by telling them what you’re into. Get the the other person to tell you more about what they are doing.

 Such as:

“Really! Tell me more.”

“How cool! How did you get into that?”

“How long have you been doing that?”

Networking Insider Tip: The trick with these questions is not to go down a list of questions to ask, hear an answer, and then move on. Success comes from listening and looking for common ground, and sharing information or offering ways you can help. The goal is to find people to establish a relationship with over time, to cultivate a new partnership. Not everyone will fit that bill.

Don’t concern yourself with getting your information in, the conversation will get around to you. At least with the real, authentic people it will. And if it doesn’t, you’ve been a rare, good listener and they will remember you.