Are You Networking or Socializing?

There are several articles that denounce socializing as trivial, boring; a waste of time. As if it’s the Amateur-Hour version of actual, business networking.

I see it differently. Very differently.

Socializing can lead to Networking: it’s honest, disarming, refreshing.  It sneaks up on people. It somehow seems easier than the potentially intimidating “networking.” People fall out of networking and just share life stories and views – the real connecting.

Socializing is about the person, their family, their interests, and things they like and do, like and have done, where they are from, what they think about and why, etc. The intent of socializing is to find common ground and shared interests.

Gee, sounds like a great start to a business relationship, doesn’t it? The conversation becomes real, and not about $$. This even works when you meet the Big Shot or the Connected Gal. Socialize to make a connection. It’s similar to the situation of a celebrity: who can they really trust? Are people after just their fame, connections and money? It’s the same for the successful business person: are people after their fame, connections and money? Reach people on a human level, not a functional or status level. It’s about genuine interest.

This is similar to selling someone else’s product or service – that’s easy. But, when you first try to sell your own product or service! Yeow! It feels as if there is a camera on you, recording every mistake to blast on to YouTube. Your own selling words don’t seem to flow, because it seems as if you are selling you.  The goal with net-socializing is to get you comfortable conversing with people at a normal communication level; looking for the common ground; practicing everywhere.  So when your next networking event comes up, you are ready!

Caveat: at a hard-core business event, people aren’t there to make new friends – they want business connections.  The event is probably not a family-gathering atmosphere. To entice them to pursue a future relationship with you, you have to “get down to business.” It’s time to go from socializing to networking. Yet, the foundation for success is the same: find the common ground – in skills, services that can be partnered, people and companies shared, etc. Therefore, the playing field & rules may have changed, but the goal is the same: a good connection.